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Permission

May 17, 2019

 

 

The sexiest thing a man ever gave me...

 

it wasn’t an actual thing.

 

It totally surprised me.

 

It sent my respect for him through the roof.

 

Turns out, it’s the easiest way to help my nervous system open and relax.

 

You want me to pause, open, and trust you?

 

This is it:

 

PERMISSION

 

More precisely...permission to be myself.

 

To feel whatever I was feeling, even if wasn’t PC.

 

To be not know what exactly I wanted.

To take my time.

To change my mind.

This is permission:

“I’m here and I want to be with you, take your time.”

Or

“It’s okay if you’re angry, I’m not judging you for it, you can let it out”

Or

“I understand if you’re not sure what you want yet, let’s be in that space together.”

Or

“We don’t have to stay here if you’re cold and hungry, I’ll go home with you.”

Permission TO BE MYSELF.

What a relief.

Cause I don’t know about you, but I sure get stuck in an imaginary life full of ‘shoulds.’

Rigidly following perceived duties. Trying to measure up to an idealized self.

And then I’m not in the moment with a person. I’m stuck worrying and imagining how things could go, what I should do.

And I forget myself.

I forget the connection in that moment.

I become a pleaser.

It’s exhausting. It’s disconnecting. It’s fundamentally untrustworthy.

Hard to build anything from that.

When do you give yourself permission to be yourself? When was the last time someone offered it you, and how did it feel?

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